The Middle

People of the Internet - lend me your advice!! (would'ya?). I'm trying to make a major decision, and in true me fashion, I'm having trouble with it. I've talked to friends and family members already, but sometimes it's good to get points of view from completely objective people who don't really know you, who have nothing to gain or lose and have no emotions tied up in the decision (though even if you know me personally, I still welcome your opinion).

I have contemplated going back to school for a while now. My struggle finding a job in Public Relations (which is what I actually have a degree in) has opened my eyes to the fact that I'm not sure the field is entirely for me, and I'm also in the crappy position of not having enough experience, but no one willing to GIVE me the experience I need. I'm stuck. So, I feel like I need a change and that I need to upgrade my skills; switch gears a bit or maybe start over. It's a good time to do it as I'm single and don't really have any obligations tying me down (no mortgage, car or kids). I also am still young enough that going back to school won't be an enormous adjustment and when I get out I'll still have a good 30 years of career-building to look forward to.

However, I'm very torn as to what kind of education I should get. At this moment, I'm torn between two completely different possibilities - two possibilities that each have their own merits and their own disadvantages.

On the one hand, I could go back to college (not University) and take a 2 year diploma in Graphic Design, which is something I already have experience in, is related to my existing degree, and is something I think I could be really good at (it's already been proven that I have the basic skills and talent to do well in such a field). This is the main possibility I've been considering up until now. On the other hand, I could take a more ambitious route and take a Bachelors degree in Nursing, which is a field I don't have as much experience in, but do think it would be a rewarding field that could open up a lot of interesting doors for me. My current temp job is actually at a local University in the School of Nursing, funnily enough, and I guess interacting with the students and faculty and doing some research into the field has sort of opened my eyes to this possibility (and perhaps it's not a coincidence that I ended up working there??? Hmmm...)

I have gone over and over and over this in my mind and I'm just not getting anywhere. This is where you come in - I would really appreciate any advice, comments or insights that any of you can provide in the comments below. I realize many of you may not have any experience or insight into EITHER field, but you still may have a unique perspective or remind me of some points I'm not considering! One option I've considered is applying to one and if that doesn't work out then pursuing the other option (for example, attempting to get into Nursing - the more competitive of the two - and if I don't get in, then pursuing GD), but I just don't know.

Here I will list the positive and negative points for each option that I'm currently considering:

GRAPHIC DESIGN: *smaller risk*
- shorter program (would be out by age 29, less investment)
- less expensive (but depends on what program and expenses - may have to get a new laptop, buy software, etc, and this could all add up; plus it could generally be harder to get work in the field, and chances are starting salaries would be medicore - could be harder to pay off debt)
- already have a base of skills and experience; would be fairly easy to apply and get in
- passion for the field (doing something creative professionally really appeals to me, as well as eventually cutting myself off from "the man" and working for myself); and could combine with other passions - writing, blogging, fashion - to develop some interesting projects or offer some valuable services; plus I like the idea of working//collaborating with other creative people
- could complete program away or at home
- no opportunities to study/volunteer abroad, which is something I'd like to do

NURSING: *bigger risk*
- longer program (4 years vs. 2 - would be age 31 when completed)
- more expensive (but pretty much guaranteed a job with a good salary upon graduation, and this is a field that will only grow and create more jobs)
- no previous experience (I've barely been in a hospital my entire life)
- could be very hard to get into the program (haven't taken science courses since high school and even then they weren't my favourite, there would most likely be an interview so I'd have to prove why I should be chosen over others; plus there are limited spots available so could end up on a wait list)
- not sure I have the passion for it or would be "cut out" for it (like that I would be able to help people and would be positively contributing to society, but don't feel it's a "calling" for me - also it's a tough job (could involve shift work, on your feet all day, dealing with emotional issues like death and serious illness, not to mention gross things like "bodily fluids", touching total strangers, etc) *I do feel, however, that I could develop a passion for this field (but there's of course the worry that this wouldn't happen and I'd end up hating it)*
- could complete the program anywhere and work anywhere upon graduation; also like the idea of being able to volunteer/study abroad (e.g. health initiatives in Africa, research projects); further to this my mom is a nurse, so she could be a great resource/contact, and my brother/sister-in-law could as well (they both work at the BC Cancer Agency - sister-in-law as Assistant to the Nursing Director), and I could talk to profs/staff through my work to gain insight into whether it would be a good choice for me
- could be an interesting lifelong career (don't necessarily have to work in a hospital - could do research, admin work, combine with current PR degree, start my own business, write books - lots of opportunity to grow)

That's all I can think of so far. I think the crux of this debate is whether I should take a smaller risk (i.e. choose the "safer" option) and avoid a lot of extra work and stress (though there's no guarantee of that), or take a bigger risk and (possibly) get bigger rewards? Or maybe there are other fields related to the above that might be a good fit for me but I'm just not aware of them or thinking of them? Have at it in the comments!

So, which one would you pick if you were me??

(very much appreciate the comments in advance)

*Not sure if you noticed, but I didn't post yesterday - and frankly, this posting every day thing is just too much for me, so I'm not gonna do it anymore. I'm still participating in NaBloPoMo, but will only post when I have something of value to say. This makes much more sense, and really who cares as long as you're blogging?*

Fashion Friday: No Slouch

Well, I've decided to start adding some new features to Ye Olde Blog. You probably have noticed I've started doing Manic Monday posts, which are short and sweet notes about random sites, photos, stories, people, places or things that are on my mind that day or that I just think are cool and want to share.

But I also have been thinking for a while that I want to somehow incorporate one of my favourite things into my posts. After all, this blog is a reflection of me, a chance to share what I like, don't like and what inspires me. I feel like I can sometimes get heavy on "opinion" and "reflection" posts and even though I AM an opinionated and reflective person, that's not all I am. I also have a fun, creative, art-loving side that I feel like I want to share more of.

Fashion is a major interest of mine - I love putting outfits together, trying out new trends, reading fashion magazines, watching fashion reality tv and runway shows. Pretty much anything fashion-related, I love. I also have FAR more clothing than one person should ever need in a lifetime, but as I always say, I could be spending money on far more destructive things, now couldn't I?!

I love style blogs and most of the blogs I actually follow are style blogs. I love seeing how "real" girls put outfits together and make their wardrobes work on a budget. I've often played around with the idea of starting a style blog but for many reasons that's not something I want to do right now - I don't have the proper camera or equipment to take good-looking photos, I don't have the time or patience to take photos of myself and post EVERY day, I don't want my blog to be ALL about style (there are many things I love and talk about here and I don't want to narrow my focus too much), and I feel like there's SO many style blogs out there that mine would just get lost in the shuffle and I didn't want to be just a "bandwagon-jumper".

However, I've been reading enough style blogs (and regular blogs) now to know that everyone has their own style, personality, schedule and preferences and it's possible to placate these things while also incorporating style into other hobbies (like blogging). I realized (as I mentioned) I really want to share my style and create more opportunities to interact with other fashionistas, and I can do that without posting every day or only posting about fashion. I realized I can incorporate fashion into this blog as little as once a week, at least to start out, without being a follower and without losing sight of how I see this blog - namely as a forum to share and discuss my passions, my life and my community.

So, without further ado I'd like to present my first Fashion Fridays post! I've decided once a week (YES on Fridays! How did you guess, you smartie pants, you?!) I will post my favourite outfit from the week, as well as one or two favourite outfits from the interwebs. I will probably centre the chosen outfits and discussion around a specific theme each week depending on what mood I'm in or what I experienced. I'm excited to make this addition to the blog and see where it goes.

Now please bare with me and my less-than-stellar photography - as I said I'm poor little Matchgirl and have a camera but don't actually have a tripod or anyone to assist me, which makes it tough to take photos of yourself and your outfit! I'm planning on getting a tripod as soon as I can, but I'd be lying if I said it is a financial priority at the moment (there are little things like...oh...rent and food that are kinda important to take care of first). I also didn't use the flash for these because I find the flash isn't so flattering sometimes - it can sometimes make one look all glowy and show every single pore and that's not really a look I wanna go for.

Anyway, I may not have fancy photos and sponsors and such, but I have passion for fashion and that's way more important in the end anyway. Plus it takes a lot of guts to take photos of yourself you're not entirely happy with and post them for the world to see, right? Besides, it's my blog so it's my rules and anyone who doesn't like it can go find another corner of the interwebs to stalk - mmkay?? (wait, where are you going?! Don't leave me...)


I love this scarf - I love me a good print - and I also love leggings. I don't care what anyone says, they are so comfy and they can be flattering as long as you wear them the right way (i.e. cover your ass and hips). I'm a major shrimp (5 ft nothing, baby) so any way I can make my legs look slimmer and longer I will try! I got the idea to cinch my scarf in the middle from one of my fav style blogs, Second Skin. I totally copied her idea (tee hee). She always looks so put together, yet comfortable, and this was kind of my theme for this week (well it's kinda how I try to dress everyday). I love the look of wearing a slouchy top with a slim, streamlined bottom, and I like layering pieces to add visual interest and colour (but not TOO much).

I LOVE LOVE LOVE these boots. Ladies, you have no freakin idea how hard it is for me to find boots that fit my ample calves (read: impossible). Picked these up at the Bay a couple of months ago (though there are already some scratches in the faux leather - grrr - ah well, get what you pay for).

Now for a couple of ladies' outfits that caught my eye this week and that I think are great examples of the slouchy-chic look:



I love the colours here and the fun print - as I said it's wearable and comfy but also cute and polished. Brit girls just have the best style - they don't take themselves so seriously



This outfit looks sooo cozy and warm, but also polished. She look like a young, hip sea captain or something, know what I mean?

Have a stylin' weekend all!! And I promise I won't be so long-winded next time, yeesh!

Closer to the Heart

If I can be frank, which I usually am on this blog, I don't have much to say today (I know, shocking right, considering most of my posts are about as long as a novel).

I'm also in a bit of a dreamy, looking-at-beautiful-photos-mindlessly sort of mood, so I thought I'd share some of my current favs on We Heart It as opposed to writing words. I just LOVE this website - it's dangerous though as you could easily spend hours perusing photos and neglect more important things like, say, eating and showering.

Didn't I say something about not having anything to say today?? Ok shutting up now...enjoy!

I seem to have an awful lot of photos of either food or animals...not sure what that says about me but anyways...

This whole NaBloPoMo thing isn't looking good if I already have nothing to say on Day FOUR. *sigh* Ah well, I must keep on rolling per my moniker though, mustn't I??

The Awakening

I've been singing in choirs since I was 14 years old, and I can honestly say I've never sang a song as profound as one my current choir is doing.

It's called "The Awakening" by Joseph Martin. It's a profound song because the melody and words are beautifully haunting, but so is the story behind it.

Our choir director explained the story to us one night as such: There was a Jr High school in North Carolina (don't quote me on the location, I honestly can't remember exactly what he said) that had basically no arts program. That is until a new teacher came along and resurrected it - every kid was a part of the choir and everyone in the school became engaged in the arts thanks to her and the entire dynamic of the kids and the school changed.

One night the teacher returned to the school after hours to pick up something she had forgotten and....was murdered in the school.

Ummmmm....yeah I know.

Those are all the details he gave us but they were enough to make everyone in the room gasp with surprise and horror. You can imagine what this tragedy would have done to the students and the school as a whole; from what I know, the progress made in the arts program basically vaporized in the wake of the death of this beloved teacher. However, (and I'm not sure exactly how - again, only got so many details and it is hard to find more online for some reason) everyone slowly got their confidence and passion back and the arts program prevailed.

That's where the inspiration and spirit of "The Awakening" come from. The song starts off very mournful, reflecting the pain, despair and disbelief those directly affected by this incident must have felt immediately following. Their "broken dreams". However, as the song goes on it becomes faster, louder and happier, reflecting the rising of the school out of the ashes of death and deciding to celebrate a life rather than mourn. "Awake! Awake!".

Needless to say, it's very moving to feel like a part of this - even though it's in a very small, indirect way. I feel like our joy and honour performing this piece will somehow float through the air down down down to the school and to the students and remind them how amazing their experience and their strength are. Maybe it sounds cheesy, but sometimes the cheesy thing is the true thing. Besides, it is an amazing example of a subject I feel very passionate about and that I feel is ESSENTIAL and that's arts education and arts programs in schools. I was lucky enough to have access to great arts programs growing up and I'm so grateful for that.

I encourage you to listen to the piece for yourself - really listen to the words and the music - so you can fully understand why I'm so moved.

Don't You Forget About Me (NaBloPoMo)

I wanted to copy this recent post by one of my favourite bloggers because I thought it was a really neat concept. She took her very first Facebook profile photo and her current Facebook profile photo, put them side by side and compared to examine the ways that her life has changed in that time. I couldn't wait to try it myself!

Here is my FIRST Facebook profile photo from January 2007:

Ugh, this is a horrid photo of me in my opinion, but in the spirit of the post I'll still put it up (I hope you appreciate me humiliating myself for the integrity of the blog, y'all!!)

So, at that time I was only about a month into age 22, approx. 3 years into University, just following my third and last co-op work term, and I believe the photo was taken in a bar somewhere in downtown Halifax (at that time, my friends and I would go out dancing fairly often). I believe I was dying my hair darker then (more of a dark brown shade - which in retrospect was NOT a good colour for me) and playing around with how to wear my bangs a lot (I'm still doing that!). What's actually more interesting to me is not the place in my life at the time this photo was taken, but the place in my life I would be in within the next 6 months. Approximately 4 months from this photo, I would be living and studying on an International Public Relations course in London, England with 18 other University students (3 from my Uni, the rest from various Uni's in the USA). That trip would be a defining moment in my life in more ways then one - it was the fulfillment of a long-time dream of living/studying abroad and meeting amazing people, but it also involved one of the worst losses of my entire life (the death of someone very close to myself and my family) and the subsequent emotional struggle. I took my first solo trip just after I heard the news, and it remains one of my proudest moments.

And, my current photo is:

Well, fast-forward 3.5 years and I'm now 25 (will be 26 in December), smack-dab in the middle of a Quarter-Life Crisis and feeling stuck between a rock and a hard place in my career and personal life, grappling with many worries, questions, insecurities and reflections.  You can't really see my hair, but it's actually similar in style to the above photo (though oddly enough I think my hair has thickened), but an auburn colour instead of dark brown (much more flattering to my skin tone, if you ask me). My outfit is certainly more colourful and creative and shows how I've become more creative and daring with my style. I have definitely gained weight, but working on that every day as hard as I can (hey, I'm human right? I blame Thanksgiving...and Halloween). I hardly ever go dancing now (more because I don't really have anyone to go with than not having the desire to), and my friends circle has entirely changed.

I have mixed feelings about this comparison - it was definitely a fun and thought-provoking exercise, however it was also a tad disconcerting. In many ways, my life was much simpler back then and I was a lot less jaded. Life was more fun and carefree in many ways too, and part of me would love to go back to that simpler existence. But life is also different in positive ways, namely that I'm ten times more self-aware, self-sufficient, street-smart and realistic now than I was then. My life isn't really worse or better when it comes right down to it; it's just DIFFERENT. And I guess in a way that's sort of comforting because I think if my life hadn't changed much in 3.5 years I would be really, really depressed! One thing's for sure, I have more ideas and projects brewing in my brain than ever, and in a way the sky is the limit on where I can go next and how I can push myself. And that's a change I can really get behind.

Manic Monday: Halloween Hangover (NaBloPoMo)

Anyone else have a Halloween hangover??

I'm sorry to say I actually don't. My Halloween was quite boring compared to past years, but it was nice to not have to be anywhere or do anything, time to relax.

To be honest with you, I've been feeling a little "funky" and down lately for various reasons, so I haven't had as much motivation in general. I don't want to be a whiner or get too personal, but I'd be lying if I said it's not tough.

However, I know it's just a phase and I'm a tough cookie though so I will prevail!! At least I don't look like Mr. Pumpkin up there ^ (ewwww)

Though I wouldn't mind looking like this little guy - or feeling how he looks like he's feeling! lol

Hope everyone had a wicked Halloween!!

You will notice over coming days that I'm participating in NaBloPoMo! Let's see how long I last *eek*