Motivation Mondays #5: Two steps forward, one step back

Needless to say I'm not as excited to write this week's weight-loss update as I was last week. I didn't lose anymore weight this week, and frankly didn't do well at all in the eating/exercising department.

I was on the road for two days for work, and anyone who travels for work knows how freakin hard it is to eat right in those types of situations. Usually, there are not many meal options (usually fast food) and you're sitting for long periods of time.

In addition to the travelling, I also had a job interview on Tuesday afternoon, which was very nervewracking and had me in a tense ball of nerves for pretty much all of Monday and Tuesday. I think I did pretty well, but it was intimidating and there are a few questions I'm not sure I answered well. Who ever really knows with these things, though, ya know? You just do your best and hope to god your best was better than everyone else's (though chances are it wasn't). I also had last minute prep for my best friend's bridal shower, and for a hike on Saturday morning/afternoon. Busy was the word of the week, so dieting and exercising was not first and foremost on my mind. When I wasn't working on all the above activities, I was flagged out on the couch or crawling into bed zombie-like.

It was one of my co-workers' last days on Friday, so we all went out for a greasy Chinese food lunch plus had ice cream cake after (I couldn't resist it and ate a piece that was way too large). The group hike does give me some points, especially since the park ended up being full of tall ladder-like stairways that we climbed (one rather large one I went down then back UP, plus I went down two other good sized ones, not to mention a couple of rather steep hills in between). We hiked for about 1.5-2 hours so it was a good workout. However, the fish-and-chip lunch afterwards probably replaced all of the calories I had previously burned off. And I felt like I was going to have a heart attack after reaching the top of the larger stairway, and my legs have been extremely sore the whole weekend. Not good - clearly need to work on cardio!!

After we got back from the hike around 3pm, I came back to my moms and did prep for the shower for the rest of the day, so I was totally exhausted by the time I got home at around 9pm (I had gotten up at 6:30am to meet everyone for 9am). Then Sunday was the actual shower, which meant running around setting up and decorating all morning, running around taking photos, cleaning and setting food up during the event, and running around and cleaning afterwards. To say it was a busy weekend is a slight understatement.

This may sound like a lot of exercise, but it really wasn't enough to burn calories (esp since I had a couple of pieces of custard-filled cake in there plus some pasta casserole). I really didn't expect to get on the scale and see any difference today because I KNEW I didn't lose anything because I didn't feel it.

Though honestly I haven't really felt the weight loss yet at all, and looking at the photos from the hike on Saturday morning, I am still not happy with my shape. I still feel like I look like a blimp in photos, to be honest. So, I'm back to being frustrated. I'm not going to give up, but I just wish I would notice more of a difference, you know?

Fitting exercise into my schedule (enough to actually burn calories anyway) continues to be hard. I talked to a friend who is signing up for a twice-weekly class, and I'm thinking I need to do something similar. If I have a class to go to that I've paid money for, I think that will be more motivating than just leaving the "fitting in" of exercise to me in my "spare time" (obviously that has worked out swimmingly so far *rolls eyes*). I'll look and see what I can find. I'd like to do something fun and energetic like Zumba or kick-boxing or something, but as usual I'm worried about cost. I've been totally broke all week. I can't even get groceries until I get paid on Friday and have to settle for leftovers until then. How sad is that? (being in a wedding party is an expensive endeavour, I'm realizing).

I've pretty much stopped following Weight Watchers altogether, so maybe I should start recording my food again. Urgh, it's just such a nuisance though, and I hate to sound like a baby but I have so many other things on my mind this week I can't be bothered. Plus, I KNOW I can stick to eating right without the points system, it's just a matter of MAKING myself do it. Frankly, I let myself go a little bit this week because I was happy about reaching the 5lb mark; I got complacent and that's how you end up putting weight back on.

Anyway, this week I'm away again for work so I imagine more fast food will be in the picture, but I'm going to at least try to make an effort to order healthier food, i.e. sandwiches/salads instead of fried or sugary stuff, smaller portions, drink lots of water. I doubt I'll get much exercise in again. This weekend is a 3-day one, however, so it will be a good chance to get out for a long hike again or take a class or something. I actually took today off work because I wasn't feeling so hot when I got up, but after I rested I got a TON of stuff done around the apartment that I've put off for WEEKS, and that feels really good. So, I can't be too hard on myself.

Alas, this is the life of a woman struggling with weight loss - two steps forward, one step back. Hopefully this week will involve the former.