Making a List (Checking it More Than Twice)

For those of you that don't know, I made a little list last year I like to call the "30 B4 30", wherein I place extremely high expectations on myself to achieve a list of 30 things before I turn 30 (which will happen - egads - on December 11th, 2014).

Masochism, FTW!

You can read up on my list here (though there have been MANY changes to the list since then).

I pretty much place extremely high expectations on myself all day every day in my life, so you would think crossing things off the list would be easy for me. However, considering I only crossed ONE thing off my list so far (#19 - Got a Capp/Espresso coffee system for Christmas - yay!), I'd say I need a kick in the butt if I'm ever going complete the entire list.

I'm probably crazy for putting this much pressure on myself (some of the things on that list are frigin' complicated and expensive!) but what can I say, I like a challenge. And I really like to try new things and seek out new experiences. Hey, I wouldn't be living up to the title of the blog if I didn't, right?

The way I look at it, it's never a bad thing to set goals for yourself. Plus, I find writing things down (and telling the entire Internet) makes me more accountable. Who knows if I'll achieve all these things, but at least I'm daring to dream that I could!

If there is anything I've learned about myself over the years, however, it's that I'm not the most self-disciplined person around. I tend to be good at talking or thinking about doing things, but not so good at the actual DOING, know what I mean? Or I will at least procrastinate on the doing for a long time then get to a point where I am so fed up with my own laziness that I FINALLY do it (then wonder why I didn't just DO it in the first place because the doing really wasn't that hard).

I seriously want to kick my own butt sometimes.

Anyway, this is something I would like to change this year. If there is something I want to do, I would like to just DO it instead of worrying about whether or not I should. With this in mind, I decided I need to revisit my 30 B4 30 list. And not only do I need to revisit it, I need to choose a few things to focus on every few months. A list is great, but it's very easy to create one then just put it aside and completely forget about it/ignore it. I figure if I break it down then crossing things off will be much more manageable.

It's important to note that many of these goals WILL need to be put on hold until I find a permanent job (call it an excuse if you want, but it is really tough to achieve many goals when you have NO financial breathing room). Also many of them will have ongoing timelines and will evolve given the circumstances. But that's life right?! And I can at least keep them in the back of my brain and lay the groundwork so when the timing is right I can tackle them head-on.

I won't bother pasting the entire list here as you can view it in my left sidebar but here are the items I'm going to focus on for the near future:

5. Sky-dive
I am hoping to do this in the summer! Obviously, since I live in Canada where winter is a cold-hearted bitch, it isn't possible to tackle this one any earlier than that. I know you have to take a "course" that costs about $150 before you can go up as well, so I will have to start investigating that once the weather warms. I plan on talking to friends that have done it to get recos on instructors/locations. (I imagine when the time comes, my expression will very closely resemble those of Jack and Morgan in the above photo, but less wrinkly).

6. Lose 10-20 lbs
Those of you that have been reading me for a while know that this is going to be an ongoing goal. I'm focusing on losing 10 lbs right now to start and I'll go from there. I've struggled with my weight for years now so this is not going to be an overnight achievement, however I'm going to try my hardest to get at least to the 10lb mark because I know I'll feel a lot better about how I look. I think losing 10-20 lbs by the end of this year is a completely realistic and manageable goal.

13. Get a dog and/or 2 cats
I plan on adopting another cat. I had to put mine down last Fall and it was really tough, but my apartment has felt so empty and lonely without a pet I can't wait to get one. I just can't afford to take one on right now. Once I have another cat for a few months I will have to assess whether getting a 2nd cat is possible or if I'd rather get a dog. Getting a dog may have to wait until I move into a bigger apartment with a yard. It's (obviously) not fair to take pets in that you are not completely willing and able to take care of 100%

14. Visit California
Gosh I really hope this happens this year! The man and I have been discussing taking an affordable vacation this Spring, and my mom and I have also discussed a road trip at the end of the year since she turns 65 in December. Both possibilities - as always - depend on many factors, but they are at least possibilities. This could relate to #20 (though we are also discussing a possible drive to Montreal/Ottawa at the end of May for a friend's wedding), and also to #30, so achieving this goal could cross off up to two others on my list! (woo-hoo!).

25. Further my education
I have various ideas in mind under this umbrella, which I won't discuss indepthly. Let me just say that there are several online courses I'm interested in taking to upgrade various skills (and for fun!), and I also have a job possibility on the horizon which may allow me to pursue a Masters degree in my field at a significant cost savings. The details here will remain up in the air for now, but this is something I'm very interested in doing soon.

26. Make painting and/or drawing into a hobby again
This is something I'm actually already working on. Long story short, I used to draw and paint and make stuff all the time and as I grew older I lost touch with that and I've always regretted it. These creative projects always brought me so much happiness and were so important for relieving stress, I really want to tap back into that. I painted a box as a gift for my mom's birthday in December, and I'm doing a painting (plus a small crafty project) for a good friend's birthday coming up at the end of the month. I'm finding that I am not so out of practice as I originally thought, and I still get the same sense of accomplishment and joy that I used to get from creating something pretty and taking an idea from my head and crafting it into something tangible using just my hands and some materials. It feels really good, and I hope I can keep up the momentum.

So, there you have it - these are the main goals I plan on focusing on in the next 6 months! I will continue to update about my efforts on the blog whenever I have an accomplishment of note to share!

Wish me luck!

Do you have a "birthday list" or "bucket list"? What things are you focusing on achieving at the moment? How do you stay accountable to your goals?

Celebrate Good Times (or not?)

Disclaimer: I don't really hate birthdays, but I do love cats in clothes. Speaking of which, I will gladly accept gifts from anyone who is so inclined to send me one. I would prefer the cat in the above photo, but I will also accept trips to Hawaii if more convenient. Thank you.

So, it's now t-minus 19 days until my 26th birthday. Most other years, I would have had the night planned a month ago - made reservations, sent invites out, developed higher and higher expectations the closer the date came. However, this year is different.

As of now I have made NO plans for the bday. None.

I don't know why but this year I just don't CARE about my bday. It has nothing to do with the number (though it is a little scary that I'll now be in my "late 20's") because that really doesn't bother me. It has nothing to do with not having ideas (I've come up with a few possibilities). Part of me does care, and part of me wants to care more, but I just don't.

You see, having a birthday two weeks before Christmas is not necessarily the most fun. Two weeks before Christmas isn't exactly prime socializing time for people I know - it's always exam time, broke-from-Christmas-shopping time, family get-together time, etc etc. I realize it could be worse (I could have been born on Christmas Day or something - though that certainly has worked out well for Jesus), but it's pretty frustrating when your plans consistently have to be modified or cancelled altogether to accommodate said bad timing.

And it's not just about bad timing - since many of my friends have moved away, or become marrieds, parents, married parents, or on-the-verge-of-married parents they just do not want to go out as much as they used to, if at all. Most prefer a quiet night in to a night out at a restaurant, concert or dancing. Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not knocking quiet nights in - I love these too, and when it comes right down to it the company is more important than the activity. However, it is nice sometimes, especially for a special occasion, such as a birthday, to go out - to get gussied up, drink fancy drinks and eat fancy food, watch people do funny or crazy things, and just let loose.

So, because my preference for celebrating, and the preferences of others, don't necessarily coincide I usually end up compromising "the plan" in order to not (depressingly) spend my birthday alone drinking a box of wine (though come to think of it, that doesn't sound so bad...)

Beyond the above, my friends have also just gotten BUSIER. They have more responsibilities and commitments (as do I) and therefore less spare time. I also hate being the centre of attention and generally get uncomfortable with being "fawned" over, so more often than not I try to plan things around making everyone happy and doing something that everyone will enjoy (which is, of course, impossible) to deflect the attention from me to the group as a whole.

Needless to say, all of these factors combined together serve to only make my birthday plans a huge chore - complicated and tiring. Rather than make me look forward to the day, I just end up dreading it all and worrying that it's not going to work out as I want it to, or ultimately ending up disappointed because it didn't, in fact, work out how I wanted it to.

So, this year I'm taking a break from birthday planning and...well, not planning anything. As I mentioned it's my mom's birthday too so we will spend the day together Dec 11th (we're getting our hair done, going to lunch then shopping as civilized and chic ladies do - or so I've heard), but other than that I will be passing the day with nary a glance or a care.

It's probably most appropriate to celebrate my birthday with my mom anyway, as it were. After all, if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have been born and therefore would not even have a birthday. And she didn't just give BIRTH to me, she had a c-section and she CHOSE the date. She CHOSE to have major surgery and languish in a hospital bed on her BIRTHDAY, just so that I could be brought into the world. And there is something pretty cool about that (though kinda crazy at the same time - wtf were you thinking mom, seriously?!).

So I guess it's nice to know that no matter what, no matter how many plans get cancelled, how many friends are too busy or too broke to celebrate with me, that there is at least one person out there with whom I'll be sharing this special day.

And if all else fails, I will just "move" my birthday to July. Everyone wants to come to a pool party, especially one with cake!

How do you normally celebrate your birthday? What are your thoughts about birthday celebrating in general? Overrated?